Tag Archives: sick

development

The Devil’s Scourge

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It was last Friday, February 11. Keana and Maia were asleep in their rooms. Sarah and I were watching something from our Netflix queue while Aliya slept soundly on Sarah’s lap. Then I heard it. A cough coming from Keana’s room. At first it sounded normal, then, in an instant, it took on a whole new life. I sprang to my feet and ran to her room, hoping it wasn’t true but being far too familiar with Keana’s every sound that I knew it was. What I saw when I entered the room confirmed it: puke. Though surprisingly contained, it still covered too much to be an easy clean-up. With Aliya asleep in Sarah’s lap I was flying solo on this one.

Turns out this was/is a nasty, nasty virus or bacteria. Keana was up literally all that night with the scourge, and being the designated catcher, so was I. It was really tough going. I laid on the floor next to her bed and every 20 minutes for almost six hours, we both awoke to handle the situation. Before we knew it, the sun was rising.

The following Saturday was Great Grandma Bev’s 80th celebration, but Keana and I had to miss it due to the nastiness. As the day progressed, she did feel better and slept threw the night with no event, and even Sunday was quiet on the sickness front. Then came Sunday night.

The devil’s scourge hit me later that night, and at midnight, it took hold of its third victim: Maia. I moved onto the floor in her room and we traded off being sick. It was one of those moments where your strength is truly tested. It lasted again, until the sun rose. It was now Monday.

Our week continued this way, Sarah being the next victim, where the sickness struck fast and hard and eventually tapered off after several days. But even though the initial symptoms ended mostly after a couple days, it seems to take several more days to fully be over all the discomforts. We thought we were in the clear on Wednesday, but then Maia got sick again, and continues to throw up once every night between 10 p.m. and midnight. Kind of strange but at least she feels and eats normally throughout the day. We’re trying Grapefruit Seed Extract (GSE) now and will be moving on to the coconut water after that. Sarah’s used both these methods when she got the scourge in Chile and Mexico, so hopefully Maia will see some results soon. Maia’s one tough girl, but something about her diminutive size makes her seem especially vulnerable and every time she throws up, it just breaks your heart.

So now it’s been over a week dealing with this. I’ve slept (barely) on the floor pretty much all week and we’ve had to clean up more disgustingness this week than we have in the last five years. The kids are itching to get back to normality and Sarah and I reached our limits days ago, but pressed on, as all parents have to, and we’re just now starting to get on top of life again. Chalk this one up to one of those experiences in life (and as a parent) that you can never understand until you go through it. You know your kids will get sick, but you just have no idea all that that entails and what kind of love, strength, patience, perseverance, and understanding it takes to get through it.

birthdays, development, family, holidays

As promised…and a little extra

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WARNING: This blog post may be boring and disgusting but you might actually like it if you stick with it. For those that don’t have the patience, here’s an outline to assist in skimming:

  1. Following up on Keana’s 5th birthday/visitors (Iana and Olivia)
  2. Easter weekend Part I (The Rogers Gathering)
  3. Projectile vomit (Best Friday Night Ever)
  4. Easter weekend Part II (Rough Start with a Strong Finish)

1. In my last post I said I’d let you know how Keana’s birthday party went, so here it is. Let’s just say it turned out better than we imagined. For one, we thought that only one friend was coming, but it turned out that the other two girls Keana invited showed up at the last minute; we were probably more excited than Keana was in some ways. As a parent you can start to see all those social perils unfolding, even at this young age, of who gets invited, who doesn’t, who shows up, who doesn’t, and what that might mean as far as whether or not they like you, etc. And in this case, there were competing birthday parties that day, so we weren’t sure the best way to explain that one. Keana seemed fine with just having one friend there, but I think deep down inside she was disappointed and Sarah and I felt especially bad because maybe if we had sent out the invite sooner the outcome might have been different. Luckily, in the end, all turned out well. The girls, even Maia and the other 2-year-old, all played really well together and enjoyed our little treasure hunt and piñata. Sarah had to give it a good bashing first though, cause there was no way these five-year-olds were going to even make a dent in that thing. I sat video-taping and laughing wondering how many parties in the world had the same unbreakable piñata. And of course, The Cake. The Cake was amazing. Grandma Jennie picked it up from La Boulangerie and upon request, it was chocolate, and not too sweet, but still rich, moist, and overall scrumdiddidlyumptious (as we say in our house). Our guests stayed from 11-after3 and we were exhausted, but Keana was happier than ever.

The next day, Keana’s actual birthday, was pretty mellow. Keana went to school, though she did try and talk me out of it. They do a special celebration though, and I knew she would be upset if she missed it (all the special attention in front of her peers), so I persuaded her to go. I took the day off work though, and after school we enjoyed some time as a family, followed by Keana’s favorite dinner, roast chicken, and some of that awesome left-over cake. It was a little hard for me to relax because I knew the next day I would fly to DC for NWP’s annual Spring Meeting (where our teachers lobby for funding from their representatives). This trip was also a longer one- I got back March 28 in the afternoon- and when I returned, Iana and her baby Olivia were visiting. Keana had the week off school for spring break, so she and Maia got lots of good time with their little cousin. Olivia is really starting to grab things, roll around, and smile, so I think it was especially fun for the girls. And I’m not going to lie, it was pretty fun for Sarah and I too. Olivia adores Sarah and has the biggest smile whenever she sees her (and a cheerful squeal or growl isn’t uncommon either).

2. On Friday we had a Rogers’ get-together up at Sarah’s Grandma Bev’s house that overlooks Millerton Lake. In attendance were Great Grandma Bev (of course), Great Uncle David (who the girls don’t get much chance to see, but something we’re going to work on), Grandpa Robert and Nana Cin, Tia, and Olivia. It was a lot of fun, but the car ride home was NOT. About two minutes into the 40 min. ride, Maia began screaming and crying and nothing would comfort her. In order to not let the screaming disturb my driving and/or drive me totally insane, I often try to focus on a piece of music or some other train of thought. This particular night, I was thinking how it was Friday night, and once upon time that meant something. It meant around 5 or 6 you would start scheming the entertainment for the night. Who’s around? What’s the dinner plan? Would it be live music after? A movie? A bar then some dancing? Maybe even a night trip to the outdoors somewhere? Now it’s a mad-dash home before the kids melt down, and on Friday, it was already too late. Kid was melting down. Poor Maia was just plain pissed off. After what seemed like hours, we finally arrived home and both kids were hungry, of course. We fed them some left-over hamburger that we brought home and some yogurt, and put them to bed.

3. Then, not long after we got Maia and Keana to bed, Keana called out. I went into her room and she looked worried. Something’s wrong with her throat she said. I began to worry she was having an allergic reaction to something and attempted to assess whether or not her throat was sore or if it felt like it was closing up. I called for Sarah, then had her stand up to see if it was just the position she was in. In the span of three seconds, I saw The Look in her eyes…I grabbed her to move her to the toilet…and…projectile vomit spewed forth on my shoulder, arm, leg, and cascaded onto the cat, who unfortunately happened to be rubbing up against my leg at exactly the wrong moment. The nastiness continued to flow onto the rug, her toys, then eventually all over her little toilet we keep in her room for night-time convenience. Like waves of disgusting it seemed to just keep coming and coming. Oh man oh man. Luckily, after that one blowout of the decade, Keana calmed down and appeared to be completely fine. Sarah and I got to work like a machine, trading off cleaning up the worst mess in recent memory and sitting with Keana to be sure it wasn’t going to happen again. Long night doesn’t begin to define it.

4. Saturday Morning Keana was fine though, and we prepared to head up to “the round house”, a small round house up in the hills near Friant/O’Neals. It’s actually where we got married, so it holds a special place in our hearts. Anyway, Jacque (our current midwife) and Frank Moschella own it, and host an Easter celebration every year there. I guess it’s usually a two-day affair, but this year we just did Saturday. It was great to see all the old family friends and I think Sarah especially enjoyed catching up with everyone and showing off her pregnant belly. Tia (Iana) and Olivia left first to head back to Long Beach and it was almost a teary good-bye. I have to admit, I got a little misty looking at the little chunk-a-munk Olivia, thinking of how much she’ll have changed and grown before we see her again, and how seemingly small and vulnerable she and Iana looked heading out the door to the open road. Anyway, we tried to enjoy ourselves and be conscious of the time, having just endured the same car ride with Maia screaming the night before, and wanting to avoid another terribly long one. Ten minutes down the road, it began. Again, Maia screamed bloody hell practically the whole way home. I put on Kind of Blue and she screamed through So What and Green on Blue (it was on shuffle) before finally falling quiet to Flamenco Sketches. Sarah had to hold her hand too, a deadly combination with the subtle stylings of Miles.

And today. Well, today was not a picture-perfect Easter. Maia was awake from 1 a.m.–3 a.m., followed by Keana waking up between 4 and 5. Needless to say, I awoke pretty grumpy with zero coffee to be found. Maia and I hung out though till 10, which was fine/fun, when Keana and Sarah got up, but Maia and Keana instantly began fighting over Easter bags they got yesterday. Papa growled, apologized, then had to head out for coffee before things deteriorated any further. We finally had our “special breakfast” of Belgium waffles and sausage around noon and the girls went out to look for the baskets that Grandma Jennie had carefully assembled for them, and that I had hid in the backyard. Sarah and I did not rally for Easter this year, so we were especially thankful for Grandma’s collaborative efforts with The Bunny. Sarah and Maia went down for a nap around 1:45 p.m., and after prepping the chicken with rosemary, garlic, salt, and pepper, Keana and I followed and had an amazing nap. This amazing nap was followed by an even more amazing dinner. Although the day started rough, with a little help, I think it was still a special one for everyone and we’ve certainly ended on a positive note.

development, family, trips

Bum rushed

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The other morning, while Maia and Sarah slept, I was sitting at the table checking my email and eating my bagel. I heard Keana’s footsteps all over the house, stopping in this room, then that one, no doubt collecting toys to play with. To accompany her footsteps was a constant stream of talking, role-playing really, between the characters she had collected. I didn’t see her at all though until something caught my eye. Out from behind the couch straight in front of me, in the only patch of sunlight that filled the normally shaded room, two little hands, each holding a character, danced around to the narrator’s voice. I couldn’t see her face or feet, just two sunlit hands playing. And just now, I walked out into the living room to stretch my legs and Sarah’s dozing off on the couch as Keana’s crooning “Once Upon a Dream” from Sleeping Beauty. She’s getting quite good at that song, hitting almost all the pitches and remembering all the words to the chorus. Hilarious.

Maia is growing into her independence. That girl definitely has some sass in her step, literally. Today she was standing on the shoe rack which is about 18″ off the ground. I warned her of the edge, and she purposely walked right up to it, put half of one foot over it and looked up at me with a huge smile on her face. I think that pretty much says it all. She can string together two and three word sentences now and continues to dazzle us with her sense of humor. She’s basically potty-trained too, so her independence grows and grows. I’m also amazed how much she and Keana can play together. Keana does get bossy, but she’s also really good at asking Maia questions about what she thinks about something or what she wants to do.

I feel like we’ve been “bum rushed” by the end of July and August so far. We spent the end of July decorating our house and really moving in. The ass-kicker for us there was hosting Iana and Ryan’s baby shower at our house on August 1. We always need an ass-kicker to really get us to finish less-essential domestic tasks. The shower was great and we really enjoyed being able to have so many family and friends over. The next day was spent quasi-cleaning up and getting ready for the annual family camping trip with Sarah’s family. It wasn’t easy, but we got it done. I think we were more inspired this year because from Fresno it’s only a two-hour drive to the campsite instead of the six-hour-usually-hellish drive from Richmond. Indeed, we got up there without much event, and setting up camp was pretty easy since Iana and Ryan were up there first and were available to help out with the girls.

I’m not going to lie though, this year’s campout was not the greatest. There were lots of family issues flying about, both Maia and Keana were sick, there were several cloudy/cold days, there was more of an agenda due to Nathan (Sarah’s cousin) and Jennie getting married up there, etc. But let me tell you what was great. Being outdoors for a week is always good for our souls. Being by and in the river was great. Keana had a blast with older friend Phoenix (9). And of course both Keana and Maia had a ton o’ fun with Uncle Michael, Iana, Ryan, Grandma Jennie and all our fellow campers. Iana and Sarah sang at Nathan’s wedding, and the wedding and their singing were quite beautiful. There was a live band in the meadow too, and our whole family enjoyed a little dance party after the potluck reception. So even amidst the stressful family shit, there really was a lot of great moments. About halfway through that trip though Maia started crying, “Home!” on and off, and I think she was spot on because it was really nice to go home.

We slipped back into our routine on August 10th, at which point Sarah got sick and now I’m sick. Keana started her first full year of preschool yesterday, August 17, and I think it’s going to be a great year. It’s hard to believe summer is coming to a close and I can only hope that we can squeeze in some redemption camping before the weather starts to change. Speaking of which, this Fresno heat is no joke and I’m really looking forward to the decline in temps as fall approaches.

family

Heating up

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Well, we’ve been in Fresno about a month now. It’s really hard to believe because on one hand it seems like the time has gone by so fast it couldn’t be that long already, but on the other hand, it seems we’ve been here for months. We’ve really hardly had a chance to breath as I jumped right back into work, Keana started preschool, and either I’ve been out of town or we’ve had visitors just about every other weekend. So without any time to establish a pattern with those crucial free moments on the weekends, the weeks just fly by.

Last weekend (5/13-18) Iana, Ryan, and their new dog Janie (sp?) came up for a visit. We were super-excited to see them, and Iana’s belly is ripening nicely with the new baby. She’s only 5.5 months, so there’s a ways to go. Janie was a new addition though and seemed pretty sweet right off the bat. Unfortunately the second day here though, the neighbor’s dog bit Janie’s paw and she had to have surgery and be under constant care the rest of the visit, so that really put a damper on things. But that’s the way with new “babies”—just can’t have everything fall into place as neatly as you’d like sometimes. At least Jani was okay in the end, and both girls, Maia especially, definitely had dog fever when they left. I don’t know, might be a dog happening some day here for Team Hokama. Maybe when we move out to more space.

Practically every day Keana asks to visit Grandma Jennie and really hates the fact that Grandma has to actually work. She definitely got her wish this weekend though, because I got food poisoning. That’s right, the Master of Disaster. We went to Sarah’s best friend Mary’s 30th birthday party on Friday night, which was fun, but kept us out late, and at 3:30 a.m. blissful sleep was interrupted by gut wrenching badness. Don’t think it came from Mary’s party, but I was almost in a daze of discomfort and fluid loss on Saturday, so all our great holiday weekend plans were foiled. Luckily Grandma was there to save the day and Sarah took Maia and Keana over to her house to play and hang out Saturday through Sunday morning while Papa excised his demons. Nasty. Luckily I’m on the upswing now and it appears Sarah and Maia only have a slight touch of whatever I got.

So those are more of the details of what we’ve been up to in the last couple weeks. We have a trip planned to the Sacramento area to visit with the Peterson Clan, hosted by Uncle Vic, Aunt Kristie, and The Cousins, so we’re definitely looking forward to that. Grandma Linda and Grandpa Sam are flying out from Texas as well, and if we’re really lucky, Uncle Peter will come too, to complete the whole clamb bake. One good thing is we’re used to “their” kind of weather now, as our weather here in Fresno has reached into the hundreds already; record temperatures for May I guess. It’s amazing how fast you acclimate. I still don’t like the heat, but 70 almost feels chilly to me now and if it stays 90 or under, our house remains a cool 75 with no AC required. Even running the AC when we want, not stressing about it too much, our PG&E bill was only about $100, so this whole thing may be doable after all!

Sarah has been amazing with the unpacking on top of taking care of the girls and the house, and has joined a nice gym not far away. There’s so many classes to choose from that she hasn’t found her “thing” yet, but will probably end up rolling with yoga, aerobics of some sort, and her own whatever. I’ve taken to running through the hood three days a week and lifting weights, and trying to find a consistent time before/after it gets too hot. I figure if I run fast enough my shoes won’t melt to the asphalt.

Hopefully these nights will continue to stay relatively cool because they provide the perfect backdrop to Giants Radio, and some much needed relief from the hot days. The upcoming months will be heating up though, and hold some camping for us, a baby shower for Iana, hopefully a trip back to the bay, visits from friends, more settling in, some tasteful decorating, some tasty bbq, and we’ll top it all off by not being the only one’s with rug-rats, as Iana and Ryan’s baby is due at the end of September! (I guess that last one isn’t really something we’re doing, but I think “the rules” specify that an event that big can be roped in by anyone hovering around.)

development

Continued from 3/19/08 (the joys of vaccinations)

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Sorry to leave y’all hanging on that last one. Bottom line, Maia is fine. We went to the pediatrician and as predicted, she had no idea what the red spots were or what was causing the fever. Of course she said it wasn’t related to the vaccines—it was just a coincidence that it showed up around the same time. Anyway, she was concerned enough to order a full blood work-up STAT. This meant we had to drive to Oakland’s Children’s Hospital to get a speedy turnaround on the results. At this point it’s almost noon and we’re all hungry, Maia still has a fever, and we don’t know what to think.

We decided we couldn’t deal with the hospital on empty stomachs so we picked up some sandwiches on the way to Oakland. We were completely stressed out. As a parent you know you have to be calm and at least pretend you know everything will be all right, but I must say, I wasn’t doing a very good job at that. Keana was of course pushing the limits on everything, knowing something was going on and that we weren’t on top of our game, and Maia continued to cry and cry. It was total chaos for a while there.

We finished wolfing our sandwiches down just as we pulled into our parking spot in the garage across the street from the hospital. I grabbed Maia in her car seat, Keana followed Sarah, and we crossed the street and entered the waiting room. We then put our names on the list and proceeded to wait. Immediately I noticed all the kids in the waiting room coughing and sneezing and with red bumps all over their arms and my skin began to crawl. “Just perfect,” I thought, “this is exactly where our kids need to be right now. SHIT!!!” Again, not the calmest parent there.

Surprisingly we got in to the lab only after waiting an hour but only one parent could go in. We decided Sarah was the best choice do Keana stayed in the waiting room. I could hear Maia screaming through the door and could only imagine what was going on. After about 10 minutes Sarah and Maia emerged and Sarah began to cry. She said the lab tech couldn’t find a vein so she just stuck the needle in and moved it around until blood started coming out. Then she had to take five files of blood for all the tests. Traumatic. Luckily (hopefully) Maia won’t remember any of this.

By the time we got home our doctor had the results and there was no bacterial infection and therefore nothing to worry about. All we could do is wait it out and use tylenol for the fever. A whole afternoon of trauma just to be told to keep doing what we were doing. Of course it’s better to be safe, err on the side of caution, but man, what a day.

development

The joys of vaccinations (and other things)

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I’m sitting in the BART station waiting for the next train to El Cerrito. We have a pediatrician appointment for Maia because we’re worried she may be having a reaction to the vaccines she got last Friday (3/14/08). We don’t think it’s anything severe but we don’t know for sure. I have a feeling the doctor won’t tell us anything conclusive either, which is annoying. Western medicine touts its knowledge and superiority but it’s always a game of chance. We’re told we should do the vaccines to prevent something terrible, but there’s only a slight chance our kids would even be exposed to most of these illnesses in the first place. Then there’s a slight chance that our kids may have a terrible reaction TO the vaccines. Of course the argument is that the benefits outweigh the risks but this is coming from an establishment with intimate ties to pharmaceutical and insurance companies. And behind these companies are, of course, people making a profit from all this. Let’s say that the majority of healthcare professionals DO have the best interests of their patients in mind. It seems that by the very nature of their profession it would be impossible for them to fully practice care to this end, because it would mean not complying with mandated protocols influenced I’m sure, by more influential, more powerful people who are in the healthcare business for money.

I know there are benefits to modern medicine and I appreciate this privilege. But as a parent, you can’t take everything wholesale, even from your healthcare providers who are supposed to be caring for you and your family. It seems to me the business of healthcare is so deep, that there’s no way we can fully trust any agent of the system, even your family doctor, because in the end, it all leads back to money and there can be no true care where this much money is involved.

I hope we’ve made the right decisions for our children and lord knows we’re paying a premium for this whole confused mess.

To be continued…

development

Sick and better

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Keana was really sick the last week in September. On Tuesday (9/25/07) she hardly ate anything and Sarah took her to the doctor’s. Two hours later, as usual, the doctor really didn’t have anything to offer except slight peace of mind—so maybe that’s something. “Probably some kind of virus, but nothing to worry about,” she said and sent Sarah and Keana on their way. I couldn’t be there because I was teaching, but luckily Iana was in town so Sarah had some support.

On Wednesday things were worse. I could hear Keana was awake by the rustling heard through the baby monitor, but she wasn’t her usual, super-chatty self. I went downstairs to check on her and the first thing out of her mouth was a very sad sounding, “You can stay home with me.” It was heartbreaking! I then noticed something dried around her mouth and neck and realized it was dried vomit. I checked her bed to confirm—yup, vomit indeed. I felt so bad for her and if you could see the look in her eyes you would have absolutely melted. They seemed bigger than usual—almost hollow around the socket—and a little sad or confused as if saying, “What’s going on with me?”.

She spent most of the day in my arms with Sarah and I taking turns with the bucket. Each time she was about to get sick she would turn one way then the other as if trying to somehow escape what was about to happen. She almost said nothing all day and when she finally did talk, it was a weak whisper. It was a challenge getting any fluids in her but she finally responded to spoonfuls of water, gradually working up to sips in the evening.

We never do this normally, but I went to the video store and rented some movies to occupy her mind. Usually she’s running all over the place with her imagination, but since she wasn’t up to it this day, a movie seemed just the thing. She had been really into Disney’s The Little Mermaid in book form so we thought that would be good. When I got home from the video store she had perked up considerably, whispering in excitement about actually getting to see the little mermaid in action. So we watched a little of the movie—stopping before any of the really scary stuff—and put our tired, but healing baby to bed. It was a really tough day, one Sarah and I were glad we didn’t have to do alone.

The next day Keana was feeling much better, gradually eating more and more as the day went on. It took almost a week for her voice to return to normal and we were really glad to have our little chirper back in the game.