Photos from June 2014
Tag Archives: school
Big Events and Finishing Strong
It’s going to be 100 degrees today. It was almost that yesterday. I can’t think of a clearer signal that summer approacheth. Around here though, the weather is a little ahead of the game—there’s still lots to be done before we can officially say Team Hokama is on summer break.
The kids have 13 days of school left, but they’re not really into “the countdown” yet in this stage of their schooling, though I know they’re ready for a long break. As usual, we don’t exactly have our summer planned out, but I’m sure it will all come together. The only definitive is our friend Adam is getting married in Medford, OR at the end of June, so we’ll be trekking up there for that. And we’ll be camping—somewhere, sometime—so that’s the “plan” so far.
Photos from April 2014
Taking Time for Puddles and Other Important Things
I started writing this blog almost nine years ago(!) as a way to fill in those spaces between photos and videos. I still look at this space in that way, but more and more I see it as a place to remind myself of what’s important in my life—a place of gratitude.
The last few weeks it’s been easy to lose sight of life. I’ve been caught up in work and details of the day-to-day. Sarah’s started a new job with It Works! and that’s been a big adjustment for everyone. It felt as if our life couldn’t get any busier and then it did. More and more I realize that’s just the way it’s going to be—especially as the girls get older and busier themselves—and more and more I’m realizing the importance of taking time to check in here. I need to take time to sort through all our amazing photos and pick out the best ones. I need to try and post some videos and then write about the “spaces in between” here. It’s one way I stay grounded in my life and there’s the added benefit of keeping a family history, too.
Continue reading Taking Time for Puddles and Other Important Things
Nothing Ever Stays the Same
I just realized that my last post was sort of a cliff-hanger. Keana did audition for the Nutcracker and despite not feeling very good about her performance in the hour-long audition, she got a part! She’ll be a “little mouse” in the December performances at the Saroyan Theater in downtown Fresno. After the initial excitement wore off, she began to feel nervous about learning her part, and now that a month has passed, she’s pretty much not thinking about it at all. Which is good, since rehearsals for her part don’t start for a few more weeks anyway. I know she’ll be great and we’re very excited to see her on a truly big stage.
The other interesting thing that’s been developing with Keana is her fear. I think as her understanding of the world develops, so does her understanding of the unknown and what’s possible, and it can be a little scary for her. For instance, she doesn’t like having the curtains open now when it gets dark. She doesn’t say particular reasons why, but she knows it scares her. Also, we started reading The Fellowship of the Ring, and even though it’s not as blatantly scary as some other books, she’s starting to understand all the darkness that Tolkien eludes to and is building up to. So tonight she said that we may not be able to finish this one now because it’s too scary, which is a first for her. And of course, it’s all good by me.
School Begins—Just Breathe
There’s nothing like the beginning of school to push some of your parenting buttons and pull many of your heartstrings. We started school here in Fresno yesterday with mixed results.
Yesterday, the first day, was actually pretty magical. Keana started third grade without a hitch—which we kind of expected—and Maia had a great first day in kindergarten. She had no problem separating from Sarah and we waved goodbye and blew kisses as she marched off. As she entered her classroom, I think both Sarah and I exhaled with relief. And when she came home, she was beaming: she loved her teacher, made new friends, and at one point in the evening exclaimed, “I can’t wait to go back tomorrow!” She also started a new ballet class last night and loved that too.
School Approacheth (and Other Things)
There’s nothing like sitting down to capture life in writing and being completely overwhelmed by what’s transpired in the 46 days since I last did this little song and dance. I struggle with deciding if I should write something heartfelt about mind-blowing transformations and lessons learned, or simply stick to the facts and events since those often tell a story within their own story.
One thing that struck me the other day too, was that now that Keana’s eight and heading into third grade, her story isn’t exactly mine to tell anymore. She already writes many of her own transcripts of events—like what we did on vacation—but I also worry about putting things about her life here that will embarrass her later or be used against her somehow in the cruel throws of growing up in a “Googleable” world. Or maybe she’ll just be annoyed if I beat her to the punch line with life events. What’s more annoying than your parents answering for you when your voice is plenty strong, right? So there’s that.
And then there’s many of my friends having first babies—which really has nothing to do with me—but on the one hand I’m thrilled that they are beginning to enter a realm where they get to hold something greater than themselves in their arms, and spend countless hours admiring and being astonished by someone that hardly does anything at first. I think about all the “firsts” they have yet to experience and a pretty ridiculous grin fills my face.
Then, as I deal with the madness of trying to get all three of my own kids to actually sit down and eat until they’re full, followed by the circus-frenzy that is bedtime, I can’t help but wish I could somehow have the answers myself and pass them on to save them from this insanity we call child rearing. Sorry friends. You’re in for wonder and amazement…and plenty of nights of the type of wonder along the lines of, “What the eff were we thinking?!”
Now they’re peacefully sleeping though, plenty tired from a busy weekend and a sleepover at Grandma’s. After eight years I’m still taken aback by how they can be so gorgeous and sweet awake and asleep. The frenzy and frustrations from the day are all but echoes and there’s so much to look forward to tomorrow. Maia and Keana will find out who their teachers will be this year. Maia’s not happy about her finger that got stepped on yesterday, but she’s a little excited about a special trip to the doctor just for her (yes, it could be broken). Back to school is Wednesday night and we still have one week until school starts, but the first-day-of-school excitement and jitters are beginning to build. It’s life and it’s happening. And the whole thing starts over in a few hours so I guess our latest trip and that more detailed update on what’s been happening will just have to wait for another night.
Sharing Through Performance
As the end of the school year approaches, so do the performances. At this point we’re not performance heavy, but there’s still enough to keep us busy on these last few weekends before summer.
On April 25 Keana had her “Notables” “thing” which was a chance for all the second-graders to dress up like a famous person in history they had been learning about, and share a short spoken piece about their person. Being drawn to strong women, Keana chose Sacagawea and was especially excited about the dressing up part. We borrowed some authentic Native American pieces from Grandma Jennie and even wrapped up a little baby to further authenticate the performance. Learning about Sacagawea was also a great experience for Keana to process a different culture and a different place in history and amidst the sharing of facts that she learned along the way, she often had lots of questions about why certain things happened and why they’re different (or the same) now.
This last weekend, May 11, Maia performed in the California Arts Academy production of The Wizard of Oz. Keana and Maia are both in ballet, but the performance-specific class was only open for Maia’s category by the time we enrolled in January. Grandma Linda and Grandpa Sam drove over from Sacramento and from Fresno, Tia, Grandma Jennie, and Grandma Bev were all in attendance.
For her little performance as a flower in Munchkin Land, there sure were a lot of extra rehearsals. Maia absolutely loved every minute of it—especially the extra rehearsals at different locations—but I’m looking forward to her having a bigger part in the future. I know she’s only five, but she is really drawn to performing and seems to have a lot of natural talent. Most importantly, she loves it. It also doesn’t hurt that the teachers she’s had so far have been very impressed by her and encouraged her (and Keana too) to really pursue dancing. So we’ll see. Gotta keep my competitive nature in check, but still try and make these opportunities available for the girls…and maybe give them a little push to get out there.
Unfortunately we couldn’t tape Maia’s performance, but you’ll just have to imagine how adorable she was and what a joy she was to watch. Sarah and I both got a little teary-eyed for sure. I don’t think it matters what your kid is doing on that stage. For that brief moment it’s as if there’s a single spotlight and mic just for them. I think it’s an important skill to have—being able to perform in front of an audience—and I think it’s a great way for kids to share something they create with other kids and adults. Definitely looking forward to more of this.
Next up: “Authors Night” at Keana’s school where all the students share a book they’ve written and illustrated in a sort of book fair, open to the school community. Always one of Keana’s favorite school events.
Emerging with the Sun
The warm sunshine has felt so good lately. And what’s felt even better is an almost healthy family! I say almost, because I’ve just now gotten over phlegmy-phlegm-phlegm and Sarah is just now getting better from a cold as well. BUT, thankfully, the kids have gotten over the rotating wheel of badness, which has allowed us to enjoy and focus on some other things…
…for instance, Valentines was a lot of fun. Keana hand made cards for everyone in her class. We cheated a little by making one drawing for the boys and just coloring each one, but every girl got a custom picture of themselves with Keana. She had herself dancing, flying, and “going crazy” and no two were alike. I have to say, she did get a little stressed out when she realized the breadth of the project she had taken on. She tends to do that—get stressed out over long-term projects. It’s very difficult convincing her she has enough time and that “it will all be okay.” Right now she’s working on her first report for second grade. They’re studying goods/products and she chose almonds. I think it’s because Sarah’s been in the process of converting them to non-dairy milk (just to see if there are benefits for them, not particularly due to any terrible allergy). Keana really likes the vanilla almond milk, so there you go. Keana’s been literally harassing us about helping her research and type. All the research and writing is basically done and it’s not due until Friday, so for now, it looks like this girl is not our procrastinator.
Maia has been having a lot of success sleeping on her own, through the night, with the help of a tracking chart (with fun stickers). It’s something we’ve tried before, but this time it’s really working. We started out three nights in a row then a small prize, then upped it to four, then five, etc. It’s worked so well, we’ve started using a chart for Keana too, but she’s working on cleaning up after herself, particularly with clothes. I too have chart, and I’m working on not getting angry or being mean, and communicating better by acknowledging when I’m spoken to. The anger thing I’ve been working on for a while but I’ve still had my moments of frustration where I raise my voice. And with three kids talking at once, I have found it easier to just listen and not talk, but when I get busy I tend to not even acknowledge important things even if I do hear them. I’m not very good of thinking of reasonable prizes for myself though (like, an iPad isn’t really a fair prize for 5 stickers), but the chart is really helping me too. I attribute it to my competitive nature. Doesn’t matter what it is, I want to win dammit, fill up those squares!
Aliya’s much less cranky now that she feels better and it’s so much fun watching her learn new things and hearing the complexity in her thoughts and speech increase daily. Yesterday she pointed and called out “O!” in the word “stop.” She’s also been figuring out “how many”, mostly just up to two. Her sense of humor is coming along nicely too and I’m pretty sure she’s going to be cracking us up regularly as she gets older. She already appropriates jokes she hears from her older sisters. That being said, she can switch to serious in heartbeat. If you call her “silly” or some other thing, she’s quick to put on her stern face and say, “I’m not silly, I’m ALIYA!” We still call her “Babe-in” too, so sometimes she refers to herself as that. She mostly doesn’t nap anymore but by the time 4 or 5 rolls around, she’s very tired and does tend to get more needy. But at night, she goes straight to sleep and mostly sleeps until 6 or 7. Her sisters are really good about playing with her and she and Maia, especially, can play around the house together for hours, running from one end to the other, caring for babies, catering an event, or just following some other imaginative adventure. This last week she started calling Maia, “Maia Mama” and looks to her for help and comfort at times. It reminds me of when Maia started calling Keana, “Little Mama” around the same age.
This weekend was the first warm one in a while—where everyone was healthy—so we went to this huge park nearby called Woodward Park and had a picnic, ran around, explored, played chase, danced silly, and climbed trees. We also visited the Japanese Gardens and had fun crossing the bridges and checking out the koi. It was a great reminder of how important it is to get out as a family and be in the sun and just do kid-like things. When there’s sickness and it’s cold and hazy out, and there’s all that stress that goes along with that, it’s hard to remember that it will eventually pass, the sun does come out and warm things up, and better times are always just around the corner.
Navigating the First Week of School
Well, we’re just over the hump in this first week of school and so far, it’s a mixed review. Maia’s been having some pretty great days in preschool and after how she struggled last time she was there, that’s been great to see. Generally she’s been very excited to go, often exclaiming, “Yes! I have school tomorrow!” The first day we dropped her off she was a little sad, but today she was ready to let go.
Aliya seems to really be enjoying seeing her sisters off to school and enjoys the special attention at home when it’s just her. Every day she flexes her newfound skills and talents and exerts her independence too. The big one I’ve noticed lately is wanting to get in and out of the car on her own and wanting to sit in Keana’s “big girl” car seat. She pitches a fit when we insist on the right-sized seat, but quickly recovers, usually being distracted by the world passing by through the moving car window. She has been very talkative too, and although her vocabulary and sentences improve daily, she often has a string of phrases that are completely unintelligible. In these instances taking cues from what she’s looking at or pointing to usually helps, but when you’re driving, it’s a lot of asking, “Ummm, what’s that baby?” Some of our favorite phrases are “Yeah, sure”, “I love you_”, “Sleepin’ me?” (She sometimes put “me” at the end of a sentence instead of an “I” at the beginning.) She continues to be a jokster and a ham, often mimicking her older sisters’ behavior like shaking her butt, walking like a fashion model, teasing, “roaring” and generally being crazy. All this is tempered by her super-sweet personality though, and she continues to be an absolute joy, especially during this stressful week.
That leaves Little Miss Keana. She is certainly still our package of sunshine and is once again a staff favorite at school. Her first day she was the only one to reach the top of the behavior/participation chart, and while that makes me proud at first, I do worry about what she’s learning about external assessment and reward, and what pressures she might be putting on herself. We try to keep the focus on how she feels about her performance and effort in school, and leave the silly grades and ranking at school. Still, I know it does sink in and we’ll certainly keep an eye on it. It’s been tough too because while she’s been excited this week, she’s also been very emotional and stressed out after school. One minute she’s bouncing around happily doing her homework and the next (it seems) she’s sobbing about how hard everything is. And by “everything” I think it’s school work, being away from home, adjusting to the new schedule, less sleep, new/old relationships at school, and who knows what else. The other thing is yesterday she had a side ache that wouldn’t go away and today it was a sore throat. At first I thought it might just be mental—or at least over-exaggerated—but she has developed a runny nose, so we may already be looking at the first illness of the year.
And then there’s us, the parents. The start of school brings new freedom but also a boatload of potential stress and adjustment. It’s hard to listen to what the girls say and watch how they behave and accurately evaluate what their going through. We get pieces of the picture and a few clues and that’s about it. With that we have to try and be loving and supportive and somehow piece together whatever they need to best navigate this new territory. And today it really struck me what a big adjustment it is for Sarah and I too and how important it is that we listen to each other, be loving and supportive, and give ourselves whatever we need to best navigate this same course. So if you’re involved with the start of school out there in any way, be strong, but most of all, be gentle.
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